Thursday, October 11, 2012

Shabbat Chol Hamoed - A guest blog

Editor's note: The NF is pleased to once agin host  a guest post from the Big Gong.

Yankel led shacharit, which I have to say, was surprisingly bearable. It was almost as if he was showing some sensitivity to the fact that we would soon have to endure 28 minutes of a man (editor's note: the same guy who led YK shacharit last year)  reading kohelet whilst his underwear was clearly too tight. They must have been very tight because he at least went at some pace.

The one foul up Yankel did make, IMO, was to use this tune during Hallel (as a bonus, the clip features both kol isha and some buxom seminary girls jumping up and down)

Just because a popular song has the same words as are included in Hallel, it doesn’t mean it suits the responsive nature of that particular part of tefilla. No one knew if they were coming or going --- and that was before they saw said clip of buxom seminary girls. (Editor's note: I take no respondibility for the Big Gong's humour).

The Torah reading was so slow, it was actually read backward. We ended up somewhere in Vaera for the Maftir.

When Ben Bollocks took the stage for Musaf an audible sigh was heard. I walked around the shul collecting everyone's belts so as to minimise the suicide attempts that would surely follow as Bollocks, showing no sensitivity to the time, proceeded to belt out his now obligatory “Avinu Avinu”. Shoot me now. Twice. And then hang me.

I just don’t get it.

thank you Big Gong.

The NF has recieved an intersting question from a reader regarding the correct nusach for the kaddish preceding Tal/Geshem....Hopefully I will respond in a post soon.

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